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I suppose whenever you go through periods of transition, or in a way, it’s a very definite closing of a certain chapter of your life – I suppose those times are always going to be both very upsetting and also very exciting by the very nature because things are changing and you don’t know what’s going to happen. -Daniel Radcliffe

I woke up this morning and realized that the day had come.  After months of struggling with the pros and the cons, I finally made THE decision in October.  Like pulling the plug on a bathtub – my decision was in motion and it swirled in commotion around me, in a whirlpool,  as the water drained, until the once full bathtub was completely empty and silent! Today  I’m no longer employed.  I’m not in the workforce. I’m not contributing to society….I am RETIRED!   Retired….WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?  I don’t even like the word“retired“… in my schema there seems to be a negative connotation to it.  And why is “tired” the root word?  It sounds like I am old, insignificant and lazy!   I am feeling so out of sorts! Who am I?  What do I stand for?  Where am I going?  I want to contribute to this world and I want to do it with passion and conviction but I am wondering what it is that I will contribute.  Is there a cause I need be cheerleader for? Should I write my book? Should I hone up on my golf skills? Train for a triathlon? Learn to play the guitar? Revisit my piano? Become a photographer?  I just don’t know!! I think the one thing that has always helped me understand myself in times of turmoil is writing. I learned this when I read the Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron.  Writing excites and empowers me. It makes me feel like anything is possible.  I must focus on the positive exciting adventure that lies before me.  This next chapter of my life is full of new possibilities –some I may not even be able to fathom yet!  I am reading a book that my brother gave me for my birthday 287 Secrets of Reinventing Your Life by Dana Hudepohl.  I think this book will inspire me to become the person I will become.  I want to document my exciting new journey.  I have no idea what this next chapter of my life will look like but I am ready to begin!

Deb

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